The Crooked and the Straight: It's pronounced "val-DEEZ"

The Crooked and the Straight: It's pronounced "val-DEEZ": "I got back today from a ten-day trip to Alaska. My cousin Allison and I flew up to Fairbanks to visit our cousin Mike. I can't begin to tell about the wonderful time we all had all at once. I did keep a rudimentary journal, and we took many, many photographs.

A few things I learned while away:

1. Alaska is big. Really, really big. If you think you know how big it is, you're wrong. It's not only really, really big, it's also almost entirely devoid of people and buildings. For example: Mike lives outside of Fairbanks on the 900 block of Richardson Highway. We stayed at an inn outside of Valdez on the 1600 block of Richardson Highway. The distance from Mike's place to the inn is roughly 320 miles.
2. You know how people from Michigan make a mitten shape with their right hand, point to it and say 'I'm from here'? People from Alaska have a similar trick: Make a pistol shape with your right hand and turn it so your thumb is pointing down and the back of your hand is facing you. That's Alaska.
3. It never gets dark in the summer. Never. But it's much easier to get used to than you'd think. Drinking a lot helps.
4. They're not 'snowmobiles'. They're 'snow machines'. Saying it wrong might get you shot.
5. I flew 2800 miles, drove 750 miles, kayaked 16 miles and hiked 3 miles, and you know what? Not one igloo.
6. There are 3,000 rivers and 3,000,000 lakes in Alaska. At least two of the rivers are named 'Clear Creek' and at least one lake is named 'Dick Lake'.
7. The winds out on the Fox islands can reach upwards of 120 miles per hour. One of the islands has a wind vane comprised of a car chained to a metal pole. Yes, a car.
8. By law, every business in the North Pole, AK city limits must incorporate some kind of holiday-themed decoration on their building and/or signage. For example, the McDonalds sign is candycane-striped.
9. Moose are also very, very big. The bulls can weigh 1600 pounds or more. To put that in perspective, hitting a bull moose with your car is like getting into a head-on collision with a Geo Metro packed full of meat.
10. Glaciers are totally kick-ass awesome."